Sex/Porn Addiction, Betrayal Trauma, Relationship Recovery

Sex / Porn addiction is just one in the list of behavioural addictions. Sex addicts often display a preoccupation with sexual urges & fantasies.  This includes the compulsive use of pornography, casual/anonymous sex, prostitution, and behaviours involving the obsessive pursuit of non-intimate sexuality.

Sex addicts often adopt these behaviours as a means of gaining momentary relief from any pain, depression or anxiety that exists in their lives.  Research shows that most sex addicts report intense shame and despair after acting out sexually. Consequently, shame & isolation often serve to maintain the cycle of problematic behaviours, and inhibit the addict from seeking treatment for sex/pornography addiction. 

Treatment for sex addiction should be individuaized, and also requires significant psycho-education. Research shows that sex addicts who have the most success in recovery include working with a specially trained counsellor, being involved in group therapy, and attending regular 12-step meetings as part of their recovery journey.    

We offer specialized individual counselling and group work, delivering psycho-education regarding sex / pornography addiction treatment, and offer tailored strategies and processes of support for the addict in recovery.  

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Although individuals may have their own set of expectations, most people enter a marriage or relationship expecting that their partner will remain loyal, trustworthy, respectful, and kind. Over time, partners come to rely and depend upon the connection, safety, and stability delivered through the trust, intimacy, and loyalty shared in the relationship. 

Betrayal Trauma occurs when the person on which we depend, significantly violates that trust or loyalty. Increasingly, the Betrayal Trauma is the result of one partners Sex / Porn addiction. The trauma experienced from this fractured attachment triggers typical “fight or flight” trauma behaviours, and severely alters chemical reactions in the brain, resulting in an onslaught of intense emotional responses as the wounded partner seeks truth and answers. Insecurities build, self-esteem plummets, while seeking answers often causes the “betrayer” to deny or ‘gaslight’ the betrayed.

Recovery from Betrayal Trauma includes the betrayed partner developing an initial sense of safety and emotional stability with support from a “partner-sensitive specialist”. Processing the layers of loss, both personally and relationally brings healing, and can return a sense of wholeness to the betrayed partner. 

We offer partner-sensitive individual counselling and group work, to help establish safety and stability for the betrayed partner, and provide pathways for pornography addiction treatment and the couple's recovery if/as required. 

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Deciding to restore your relationship after the discovery of addiction, and the trauma of betrayal is a courageous and ultimately rewarding choice. Specialized recovery work helps you develop empathy and to understand your partner's emotional needs.   Recovery work includes individual sex/pornography addiction treatment, individual healing from Betrayal Trauma, specialized Couples Therapy, and may also include completing a Full Therapeutic Disclosure.  Couples can learn to enjoy an enriched relationship, develop greater intimacy, and learn to live a sexually healthy life.

Full Therapeutic Disclosure (FTD) seeks to build a solid foundation on which a healthy relationship can be rebuilt.  FTD is a positive process and format for disclosing the full extent of any betrayal, sexual addictions, or infidelity in your relationship.

Accessing support from trained professionals to guide you through a FTD, can limit further damage to you, your partner, and help you work towards a foundation of truth should you choose to rebuild your relationship. 

We facilitate a FTD as an intensive in one day.  This highly specialized process typically requires a lead time of 6-8 weeks to prepare both partners for the event.

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